Wednesday, September 30, 2009

"Did you Add to it?"

I got a really interesting question this past Saturday at my daughters Soccer game. I try not to dwell on the negative, when it comes to creating content for this blog. But the comment keeps nagging at me. The best way to get something out of your system is to talk about it. It was not a extremely major incident, but none the less, it stood out to me as odd.

So I am sitting down with my fellow soccer moms, and a lady (mother of a family friend) that I have not seen for a while recognized me before I saw her. So she starts to say hey... I almost didn't recognize you. Then she makes her hands go up and down as she looks at my hair and says "You added to it!"

I at first I froze... lol. I didn't quite understand what the hell she was talking about. But then I realized that she somehow thought that my hair was artifice and that I could just add to it to make it longer. I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt, and assume that she did not mean any harm. Ignorance often comes from just not being educated on certain matters. So I just turned to her and politely said "It's growing." And she then said "Ohhh....." as if that was an odd theory; and then went on her way... lol. So it was not a huge thing. I just needed to get it out of my system. Thank you for reading!


  1. I've worked at my company for 7 years now...people still think that I 'add' to my hair. One coworker, who has known me since my hair was 2 inches long, actually thought I added bit by bit over time. Crazy.

  2. Now that extensions and weaves are common place for just about every race, I find that i get comments like that now. When I used to have extensions years ago people would ask how did my hair grow so fast and what was my secret? I would then have to explain that it wasn't real. Now with my natural hair, people sometimes assume it isn't real. Perhaps its because of the versatility in styles and lengths I can have. But the new assumptions of it not being real are interesting.

  3. That's funny, my hair's not even that long yet & people ask me if it's my hair!!

  4. Hey,
    At first, I just like to say that I'm french and African. So, I hope you could understand me.
    I started my locks 9 months ago. At the begining the curent lyrics were " Oh! You cut your hair?!"
    Grrr... I'm not a teacher, I can't stand anymore to educate this kind of people. But I do. And I'm still saying to myself "It's true: Black people knows a lot about White people. Why WP don't know anything about us?!!"
    Of course we are not so different, we are all humans. In this case, we don't have the same hair. It seems like they are worried when we decided to be natural and it semms that it's natural for them to see us trying to look like them...
    Love your blog, Ican't find a one like that in France!!

  5. I thought I was the only one this happened Whats's funny is that people actually have the guts to ask if I added. Maybe its just me, but I would ever ask anybody that.BTW your hair is beautiful!

  6. Very good question Nell! I have spent my whole life adjustting to other cultures and learning all about them through Media, history being taught in school and from first hand accounts. It is a shame that not every cultures is treasured the same way; and that not all cultures have same level playing field as far as being taught to children in public schools; or the same amount of positive exposure in the media. Our culture is usually only learned through special edition shows, talk shows like "Tyra" or if a person acutally knows someone of an ethnic culture. Or if a person actually makes an effort to visit another country or actually takes in interest in another culture. Sad but true. A lot of ethnic culturs are learned about throught sterotypes and misguided information.

    Loc Mocha - thank you for your comment as well. Nope... lol. You are not the only one this has happen to. And thank you for the compliment!


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